It’s About Training Attention
One of the most common reasons people say mindfulness “isn’t for them” is because they believe they’re doing it wrong. They sit down, try to focus, and immediately notice how busy their mind is. Thoughts wander. To-do lists appear. Frustration sets in. At that point, many people assume they’ve failed. In reality, that experience is exactly what mindfulness is meant to reveal.
What mindfulness actually is
Mindfulness is not about emptying your mind, stopping thoughts, or feeling calm all the time. It is the practice of paying attention to what is happening, as it is happening, without judgement.
That might include:
- noticing your breath
- becoming aware of bodily sensations
- observing thoughts as they come and go
- recognising emotional responses without trying to change them
The goal isn’t to control the mind. It’s to notice it.
Why a wandering mind is not a problem
From a neuroscience perspective, the mind wandering (not wondering like I, Meg always think) is completely normal. The brain is designed to think, plan, remember, and anticipate. When you practise mindfulness and notice that your attention has drifted, that moment of noticing is the practice. Each time you gently bring your attention back - to the breath, the body, or the present moment - you are training attention in the same way a muscle is trained through repetition. Wandering isn’t failure. Noticing is the skill.
Mindfulness and the stress response
Stress often isn’t caused by what’s happening in the moment, but by how much time the mind spends replaying the past or anticipating the future. Mindfulness helps create a small amount of space between: a situation and your automatic reaction to it. (inset Alison and her brilliant practice)!
That pause can reduce reactivity, support emotional regulation, and improve how people respond to pressure over time. This is why mindfulness-based approaches are used within healthcare settings to support stress, anxiety, and long-term wellbeing.
Why mindfulness doesn’t always feel relaxing
Another common misconception is that mindfulness should feel calming. Sometimes it does. Often it doesn’t (most of the time if you’re me). Becoming more aware can initially highlight tension, discomfort, or mental noise that was previously running in the background. This isn’t a sign that something is wrong - it’s a sign that awareness is increasing. Over time, people often report feeling more grounded, not because life is calmer, but because they are better able to notice and respond to it.
What this means for everyday practice
Mindfulness doesn’t require silence, incense, or long periods of sitting still (I wouldn’t be able to do it, if it did). But it can be practiced while walking, eating, breathing at your desk or during moments of stress or transition. The skill is attention, not the environment
The takeaway (& a note from Meg)
If your mind wanders, you’re not bad at mindfulness. You’re human. Mindfulness isn’t about switching your brain off. It’s about learning how to notice where your attention goes - and gently bringing it back. That skill, practised regularly, is what supports long-term mental wellbeing.
Honestly, without Alison teaching me about mindfulness I’d probably be a heap on the floor given the stress I’ve been through in the last 12 months. Initially I thought it was ‘a bit wishy washy’ but now, it’s on my list of things ‘to do more of’ in 2026!
Subtle plug, but I personally recommend working with Alison on this and you can email her directly, go ahead and skip me! Alison@islehealth.co.uk
ALSO as I write this, I think the next one should come from our expert!